10 Ways to Screw Up an Interview!

1) Make a joke at the examiner's expense : This is a sure shot winner. Will definitely put you in the spotlight with some very bad light!
2) Sit down before the committee does: Well common courtesy aside, gives the committee the wrong impression. Make sure they realize that you have no respect whatsoever for them. If you're standing during the examination, well then you won't get this opportunity; though there are MANY other chances you still have!
3) Smile too much: It is often misconstrued as nervousness! DO NOT hide the pearly whites even if the examiners don't believe in returning the favor.
4) Try to be too convincing: Rest assured, there will some people on your panel determined to challenge anything you say. So best way to ensure the situation deteriorates further is by continuous nonsensical yapping even when the interviewer seems disgusted beyond repair.
5) Forget important technical terms : Alas! The human brain and its ways! At precisely the moment of truth, some of your brain cells voluntarily commit suicide and there is no way you can retrieve the lost information. Cash into the situation by staring blankly into mid-air or the conventional chewing of fingernails.
6) Have a blackout! : Very close to temporary amnesia but only a more TOTAL form of it. When all the voices in the room fade out and all you can see is black infinity. Don't worry though, it is usually a good thing. As in your case. the interview is soon going to end and someone smarter than you in going to get the gig. No one said it would be a good thing for YOU!
7) Wear uncomfortable clothing : This is like the silent killer. Because you feel a twitch and you can't get to it and its still while the panel is asking questions you are busy focusing on cloth threads or that imaginary bed bug climbing up your back. Damn! If only you could get to that! Meanwhile, your audience is still wondering why even after such focus your answers are void.
8 ) Have a look at the clock : This is an absolute must! Having the realization that you have been drilled for so long and yet such little time has passed is an excruciating one! This is when time seems to stand still and you give up any hope of redemption. Let these brutes know that you're too scared to be with them in a room for more than 5 minutes and hence a working relationship is next to impossible!
9) Drink water: Contrary to what some people believe, drinking water never calms anyone's nerves! In fact on occasions, will activate the synapses suggesting nature's call in your head. Only adding to the sense of urgency in your head. The constipated look is a sure winner in this situation.
10) A No-show : Well if the previous steps didn't get you there, this surely will.It will definitely save you the anxiety during the exam. How about watching another rerun of Friends?

No comments:

Post a Comment